beingamom, blog, blogging, family, marriage, motherhood

A Newly Born Mother

It’s a long wait of nine months to meet the person you have nurtured inside you, to feel those tiny little feet that kept kicking you day and night, to finally look into those innocent eyes and see your reflection and by all means, it’s worth the wait.

Did you know what lay ahead of you??
I did not and I dont see anything wrong with that.

As the days go by, we get to learn the basics of being a mother. Just like babies are considered newborns, a woman is also a newborn mother. The only difference being she knows how to talk, walk, convey the message bladder control obviously, which a new born child doesn’t know.

It’s OK if you read your baby’s signs wrong. As a first time mom, I goofed up a lot of times. At times when my daughter cried I thought she’s hungry, but she wasn’t. She cried because she was colicky. When she turned red in her face, I thought she needed a diaper change but she actually didn’t. When she used to get restless in her cot at night, I thought she was colicky, but no, all she wanted was to be held and rocked.

No one was born perfect and as a Newly born mother (not a newborn’s mother), neither are we and there’s no shame in accepting it.

As the mother and the child grow up, they learn together.Soon you are able to understand when the baby is hungry and when they are just seeking attention. Keep telling yourself that when your child turns a year older, so does your motherhood.

Motherhood is a tough and demanding job but like any other job, we need to work smarter, not harder.

We also learn that it’s ok if your child is not at par with the child next door. Don’t beat yourself over it. It doesn’t mean there’s something wrong with your baby. Every child is different and grows differently. It’s ok if your husband and you are right handed and your child is left handed. What’s wrong with that?? It’s perfectly fine if you feel overwhelmed at times. We all do. That doesn’t make you a bad mother. We all have our highs and lows and you are a newly born mother, remember??

I have two beautiful mothers as my friends and their girls are the same age as my girl. One can write alphabets upto ‘Z’ that my daughter cannot and the other started walking at 7 months which my daughter didn’t. Does that make my baby less smarter. I don’t think so. My daughter has a different pace and I am perfectly fine with it.

It’s fine if you need some ‘me’ time. Who doesn’t like a peaceful shower or a long due manicure. You can’t spread happiness without being happy. So chill and just go for a warm bath.

I have seen a few moms tagging themselves as bad mothers because at times they miss going to work and they miss the freedom they had.

WHY?? WHY?? WHY??

There’s nothing wrong in missing your past life. It doesn’t mean that you don’t love your child. Blame your hormones and move on. A lot of times we have a bad day or may be the child is not well or may be we are simply PMSing and we miss the old times. BIG DEAL!! Does it change your dedication as a mother. If it doesn’t then why should you put yourself through the misery?? I worked for four years as a cabin crew. My job took me around the world, I met and worked with new people everyday for four years. I lived out of a suitcase.

Do I miss it at times – Yes, I do.
Will I leave my baby to go back – NO, NEVER.

So how does that make me a bad mother??

Its fine if your mom is a better mother than you. When you gave birth to your baby, it didn’t mean that you were nominated for the ” BEST MOM” category. It meant that you have to bring up your child to the best of your ability.
It’s fine if you don’t want to do everything the way your mother did. Being a mother doesn’t mean copying someone else’s life book. Read theirs, analyze it, take pointers and write your own book. There’s no rule book on how to be a mother. If every child is different, so is every mother.

Build your own experiences and cherish every moment of it. A date that you cross on the calendar will never come back, so make the most out of it.

HAPPY PARENTING!!!